


You Like Beef?

by McDannoMauLoa



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Coda, Episode Related, Fights, First Kiss, M/M, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-21
Updated: 2013-04-21
Packaged: 2017-12-09 03:31:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/769481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McDannoMauLoa/pseuds/McDannoMauLoa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was bound to happen eventually. Catherine and Danny get into a fight over Steve after they arrive home from Korea.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Like Beef?

**Author's Note:**

> Episode Coda for 3.20 "Olelo Pa'a"
> 
> Spoilers for Episode 3.20 
> 
> "You like beef?" Is Pidgin for "You wanna fight?" 
> 
> Because this is coda fic, this work is not canonical with my ongoing McDanno series.
> 
> Tattoo is the name of the diminutive 3'11" manservant from "Fantasy Island" (ABC, 1977-1984), who is famous for announcing "De plane, de plane!" at each guest's arrival on the island.

Steve locked eyes with Danny across the cemetery for some time, trying to decipher the stare his partner returned. Concern had clearly taken root in that expressive brow, but his jaw was set and his eyes steeled as though he were angry.

He patted Kelly’s shoulder once more, smiled, and gave a silent farewell to her and her daughter. There would be time to catch up with them later, but there was only one way to find out what Danny was thinking, and that was to drag it out of him. His limbs felt heavy and the ground seemed noticeably squishier as he advanced across the lawn toward his team, and out of the corner of his eye he caught a concerned look from Catherine flash in his direction, although she stayed engaged in her conversation with the chaplain.

Danny’s gaze continued to bore into him as he kissed Kono on the cheek and clamped a bro hug on Chin. His embrace with Danny, was, as always, longer, and came with the same heat and excitement all of his Danno hugs did, Danny felt smaller and tenser in his arms, as though he was steeled and shrinking away from him. Confused, he held on longer and tighter and pulled away more slowly than usual, again trying to gauge Danny’s eyes for a read. Looking into them he found a nondescript tension that he couldn’t characterize, and it bothered him. Danny wasn’t easy to read but he’d thought he’d figured out something during the past three years.

He pushed the thought out of his mind. Why did he care so much anyway? Whatever, screw it, he did.

“So, I remember something about a plate of wings at Side Street?” he asked.

Danny squinted at him and gave a tight smile. “Change and meet you there in an hour. How about these two clowns join us, eh?”

“I never turn down a plate of their kimchi fried rice.” Chin smiled.

“Or two.” Kono grinned. “Split some fried pork chops too, Cuz?”

Chin nodded.

“Not gonna leave me out, are ya guys?” Catherine sidled up next to Steve. “I could go for a nice juicy steak.”

“Side Street in an hour.” Steve confirmed. He caught another quick glance at Danny, who had already turned and was heading toward the Camaro. He felt Catherine’s hand slide into his as he watched the blond chevron pattern on the back of Danny’s head get smaller and smaller, still glinting in the afternoon light. He wondered why the man mesmerized him sometimes.

***

Side Street Inn is perhaps one of the least polished dives in Honolulu, located in one of those buildings where the storefront looks like a back entrance, surrounded by air conditioning units and exhaust fans. What it lacks in polish, it makes up for in substance; greasy fried pork chops, wings, kalbi ribs, and other island favorites make it a standby among local chefs and foodies, and just about anybody else who works in Downtown Honolulu and wants a beer and some greasy comfort food at the end of their day – whether their _pau hana_ (Hawaiian for “happy hour” – literally “finished work”) is at 5PM or midnight.

The 5PM crowd greeted Five-0 that evening, just as the afternoon rays were at their longest and the sun was making its final dive into the western ocean, illuminating the skyscrapers of downtown Honolulu and turning the mountains behind them rich green-gold, and the surrounding clouds a rainbow sherbet of pastels.

Danny was already taking up a table for six when he arrived, with two Longboards set in front of him, one of which he was peeling the label from.

“Hey buddy, what’s eating you?” He asked as he sat next to Danny and took a swig from the beer in front of him. “And why is my beer half drunk?”

“It’s not your beer, it’s Catherine’s.” Danny said, eyes still focused on the label he was extricating. “She’s in the bathroom.”

Steve caught the server’s eye and wiggled the beer bottle as a signal to bring another.

“You didn’t answer my question, Danno. What’s wrong?”

“Don’t call me Danno. You worried the shit out of me, Steven. This was supposed to be a routine, ‘Hey, North Korea, how’s it going, thanks for the remains.’ This was _not_ supposed to be another, ‘Get strung from the ceiling like a side of beef.’ incident!”

“I didn’t get strung from the ceiling, Danno—excuse me— _Daniel._ ”

“Dammit.” Danny exhaled, and then his voice dropped. “You scared me, ok?”

“Danny, you didn’t know how close I was with-“

Danny turned to face him and cut him off, his voice still soft. “You scared me. I was scared – and I only normally get scared when it comes to Grace, but this time, you scared me.”

“You’re scaring _me_ , Danny. What’s this about?”

Danny sighed. “I don’t know if I should even- nope, I’m not gonna.”

Steve was about to ask what, exactly, he meant, but Catherine reappeared at that moment, looking frankly quite stunning in a baseball shirt and a pair of jean cutoffs.

 _Damn,_ Steve thought. _That woman could look like a million bucks in a burlap sack and a pair of slippers._

She didn’t mention her seat had been usurped by Steve, but instead sat down across from Danny, her piercing dark eyes sizing up the situation in a split second, and Steve though he detected the faintest smirk as she slid her beer across the table and took a swig.

Danny was conversant but withdrawn as they shared stories of what had happened in North Korea, and Steve reminisced about his fallen comrade.  No sooner had he felt a frog in his throat when he began to talk about trying to identify Freddie’s decomposed remains, when he also felt Danny’s hand pressed into the middle of his upper back, and he noticed Catherine biting her lip.

Kono showed up just as the first order of wings arrived, and Chin was less than a minute behind her.  It felt good to be back among his best friends, even though he hadn’t been gone from Hawai’i for more than 72 hours. Plates of food and beer continued to be brought out, and after three beers and two plates of chicken wings, he was pretty well sated, although Danny couldn’t be stopped and had put in an order for yet another plate.

He’d just ordered another beer when a familiar, perfectly coifed personage stepped through the door of the bar.

“Mom!” Steve raised a hand to get her attention. She smiled and stepped over to their table.

“What are you doing here?” He asked, trying not to sound as though he were prying.

“Sometimes a girl gets in the mood for a fried pork chop, honey. I’ve never _quite_ mastered them at home.”

He couldn’t tell if she was lying to him, but then again, he could never tell.

“Please, join us, if you’re not meeting someone.” He motioned toward the empty chair next to Danny.

“Don’t mind if I do?” She asked, setting down her purse to a chorus of agreement from the table. She scanned the table and her eyes settled on Danny, darted to Steve, back to Danny, and she rolled her eyes and smirked. Steve didn’t like it, but the rest of the table was busy trading stories about Frank Bama and the case of the “buzzarded” chopper.

The beer continued to flow, as did the plates of wings, and fried pork chops until Steve was feeling more than a little tipsy, and the North Korea stories had been pedaled back to the previous rescue mission when Steve had been the “cargo” they had gone over the border to retrieve.

“You couldn’t imagine the look on my face when the truck stops and the light floods in and I see _this guy_ staring at me.” Steve grinned, slapping a hand on Danny’s thigh twice for emphasis.

His heart pounded and in a single bold split-second, he decided to let his hand rest. The rest of the company appeared too drunk to notice, and kept talking, and the seconds ticked by slowly, as Steve tried to maintain his composure while he waited for a reaction. He wasn’t sure what he was doing or how he was going to explain it if Danny reacted. He saw Danny look down at his lap out of the corner of his eye, and he did his best not to look over when he felt Danny’s own hand curl around his. He waited for the pressure to come, waited for Danny to take hold of his hand and lift it off his thigh and place it gently back in his own lap, but it never came. Instead, he felt Danny’s thumb brush across his knuckles twice in an unmistakable response: he liked it!

His dick instantly went hard, and it was everything he could do not to take the hand, take all of Danny and throw him out across the table and take in as much as he could all at once. Steve curled his thumb across the denim and curled his fingers down the inside of Danny’s thigh, feeling the raised hem of his boxer briefs underneath his jeans, tickling where the muscle gave way and became squishy where the little bit of skin spread across the cushion of the chair. He felt slightly depraved, feeling up another man under the table in front of his Mother, two best friends, and. . . Catherine, but he faded into comfort as he began to realize what all the tension of the past three years had really meant.

He slowly faded back into the conversation when he realized it was Danny and Catherine talking, and they were talking about him.

“Yeah, Danny, why _did_ you call me? You knew why we were in North Korea, you knew what was up.”

“I told you, I was calling to check on my boy. It, eh” he looked up at Steve, who saw sudden electricity dancing in his eyes, “it was obviously difficult for him, and I, uh, I just wanted to check on my boy, Catherine, like I told ya.”

Steve's dick pulsed every time Danny said “My boy”, and he was starting to get a little uncomfortable with Catherine’s questioning, but that was tempered by his curiosity to see exactly where it was going to go. Hand still firmly planted on Danny’s thigh, unbeknownst to the rest of the company, he shifted in his chair and remained silent.

“ _Your_ boy.” Catherine said tightly. ” _Your boy!?!_ Who do you think you’re talking to?” Her voice raised slightly and Steve saw smiles beginning to fade around the table.

Danny seemed stunned, but Steve knew he was brewing a rant. He squeezed Danny’s thigh for reassurance and then slipped his hand away as his face flushed with embarrassment when he noticed the bartended and some other diners take notice.

Catherine wasn’t done. “You just called to remind me where I stand, huh Danny?” She put an imaginary phone up to her ear. “Oh hey Catherine” she said in an overblown imitation of Danny’s New Jersey accent, “Just called to remind you Steve’s mine. Love, Danno.”

“Who is that, Joe Pesci?” Chin said with a laugh, trying to defuse Catherine. Kono shot Steve an urging look. Steve took it in and, still feeling buzzed, shot a look at his Mother, who was sitting closest to Catherine at the end of the table. It infuriated him that she continued swigging beer with a rather bemused look on her face. She caught his look and shrugged in return.

“Don’t call me Danno.” Danny ground out. “And so what if I want to call and ask how Steve is when he’s in, I dunno, _a hostile country where he’s already nearly been killed twice!?_ I am _not sorry_ for worrying about my partner and best friend’s well-being, but I am _not sorry_ that _you_ have a problem with it, ok? I am _not sorry_ that I love him!”

Danny’s timing couldn’t have been more perfect, for he had nearly shouted the last words loud enough to stop all other conversation in the bar, which had already quieted some because the song playing overhead had just ended. Doris, Chin, and Kono sat frozen, and Steve began to inwardly fume looking at Doris, who was now grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“Oh so the Keebler elf does have balls eh? You can finally admit you’re in love with him now, can ya? We all knew anyway!” Now Catherine was shouting.

“That’s it!” Danny shouted back, throwing down the paper napkin he’d bunched up in his palm and beginning to stand.

“Eh!” The bartender joined in the shouting. “You like beef you take it outside, yeah?” He gestured toward the door with his thumb.

“I’m in!” Catherine hissed at Danny who shot back “You’re on!”

“Whatever, you’re going down, Tattoo.” Catherine tossed over her shoulder as she headed for the door, with Danny, Steve, Chin, and Kono in hot pursuit. Doris, still grinning, silently motioned to the waitress for the check as she dropped off another beer, trying not to chuckle too loudly into the bottle as she took the first sip.

“Seriously, this is what I’m up against?” Danny jeered as he hit the pavement outside the bar with a little bounce in his step. “You ever wonder why Steve always corrects people when they refer to you as his girlfriend, eh?” Catherine frowned. “Why he always makes that poop face and denies it?”

“What, I don’t make _poop face_!” Steve protested.

“Yeah ya do.” Chin and Kono said in unison.

“Think about it!” Danny interjected again. “When do you get phone calls huh? When he _needs_ something.”

“’Oh of course Steve!’” Danny mocked in falsetto. “’Here’s the government secrets, just pick up a pack of rubbers and some ribeyes and come by later!”

“Don’t hear him complaining, do ya?” Catherine smirked.

“He might not, but there’s a _word_ for that, you know – when you pay in trade. Say, what’s the going rate these days. Misuse of naval intelligence for, say, twenty minutes of oral?”

“Steve!” Catherine protested, gesturing.

Steve silently gestured back toward Danny. He was kind of interested to see where this was going. By Danny’s logic, that actually made _him_ a prostitute, although he wasn’t going to correct him.

“Yeah, it’s damn good.” She said, advancing towards Danny, “And I’m not giving it up without a fight. And you don’t even know what you’re talking about! We’ve been doing this since long before I was in a position to give up government-“ Catherine caught herself, and shot a look at Doris, who had appeared in the doorway.

“Don’t mind me, girls.” Doris said, wryly.

Catherine laughed. “See, Danny, you don’t have anybody fooled. You’ve got this whole macho police detective who just happens to wear fruity socks thing going on, but I’ve heard you squeal like a little girl! I’ve watched you pine for Steve like you think he’d even think about swinging that way. That’s why _I’m going to win_ in the end. Who’s got two thumbs and a completely heterosexual boyfriend? _This girl.”_

“And you’re clearly not at all worried about it; otherwise you wouldn’t be trying to pick a fight right now.” Doris quipped.

“Just saying!” She protested as Steve, Kono, and Chin turned around.

Steve felt a lump in his throat. “Actually, Catherine, this probably isn’t the best place to bring this up, but when I told Freddie’s little girl I loved her Daddy this afternoon, that wasn’t a lie.”

Kono gave an audible gasp and Doris snorted as Catherine looked like she’d been hit by a freight train.

Steve shrugged. “Sorry, meant to tell ya.”

Danny smiled and gestured with his index finger. “So, you uh, you had a bunk buddy Navy SEAL drunken sailor kinda thing going on?”

“It’s not queer unless you’re tied to the pier, buddy.” Steve quipped. “I’ll tell you about it later, Danny.”

“Shoulda used that line when I landed that tuny fish, eh?” Danny grinned.

Danny was about to turn around when Catherine head butted him and they both tumbled to the pavement in a sea of insults.

“Ankle-biting Pomeranian Pipsqueak!” Catherine shouted, trying to pin Danny to the ground.

“Double-crossing government waterbed!” Danny shouted, fighting her off, trying hard not to hit a girl.

“Arrrrrgh!” Catherine groaned as Danny caught a fistful of hair.

Doris rolled her eyes. “You’d better pull them apart before they kill each other.” She motioned to the three Five-0s.

They managed to pull them apart, Kono on Danny and Chin on Catherine while Steve stood in between them while they both heaved in air.

Steve sighed.

“I don’t know what to do.” He said.

“Do you love me?” Catherine demanded.

“Do I _what_?” Steve asked.

“Don’t do _Fiddler_ with us.” Danny protested. “Do you love her?”

“Yes,” Steve said. He saw Danny’s shoulders slump over.

Catherine stared at Steve for a long moment. He felt like she was expecting him to go to her, but he already felt self-conscious in front of Danny.

She rolled her eyes that let out a long breath. “But?”

“I love you.” He said. “Come on, Cath, you know I love you.”

“But?” She asked again. Her piercing eyes were too much for him to ignore.

“I’m not in love with you.” He sighed. It was Catherine’s turn to crumple.

After another uncomfortable silence, Danny was the next to speak.

“Are you in love with me?”

“Yes!” Kono, Chin, and Doris shouted in unison.

For the first time that day, Steve read the emotion in Danny’s eyes as clear as a bell. They were filled with hope, and they waited expectantly for confirmation.

Steve grinned, and started to laugh, and nodded.

The two stood suspended in the parking lot, as though neither of them were sure what to do next, as Chin and Kono beamed and Catherine silently slipped away.

“How bout a kiss, sailor?” Doris called, arms folded, still grinning.

Steve wasn’t quite sure what to do, but Danny seemed to have an idea. He stepped up in front of Steve, grinning, his arms slipping around Steve’s waist, while Steve’s hands found his way all the way around Danny, almost where the meet on opposite sides of his front again as he held him close and kissed him for the first time, softly, innocently, and for nearly a full minute while Doris, Chin, and Kono clapped.

When they parted, Danny was the first to speak.

“You scared me, Steven, because I love you, too.” 


End file.
